Valley of Bones

Seasons are flying by, and I am loving all the things that are happening.  The bluegrass band I am in is recording a CD, the dog is happy (especially after meeting may family in Maryland over Thanksgiving), I have a break from classes, gym classes are good, and I am getting into the holiday music any time I am at my desk at work.

One thing that has still been a little off though is connecting with God.  I have thought and over-thought about it.  And I still don't feel the level of intimacy that I felt with Him on the mission field or in other times of my life.

But then I get thinking about the Israelites and how they pine for Egypt when they are faced with the desert.  How often do we distort the past when the future is unknown?  Perhaps that is what I am doing here.  Perhaps I remember being closer to God, because I remember only the moments of revelation, not the moments of silence and waiting.  And perhaps I am just as close now as I have ever been.

Maybe it is a perspective thing, and I need to keep focused on Him in the now, to keep the right perspective.

Not long ago I was reading about Ezekiel and about how he entered the valley (the low place) as he was being led by Holy Spirit.  Maybe when we are in low points in our lives, it's because we are following His lead.  Really, Christians are never set apart by their mountain-top experiences, but by how they respond to the valley.

Anyway, I oddly enough see myself both as Ezekiel who God has lead to speak life into dry bones, and also as the bones.  I feel dry, and worn, and dead at times.... but instead of just laying around on the ground waiting for life, perhaps, I am called to speak that life.  I, perhaps, am the one to speak His truth over myself until the life flows, the breath enters, and the army is raised, so then I can go on and do the same for others.  What am I waiting for?

Ezekiel 37:1-14New King James Version (NKJV)

The Dry Bones Live

37 The hand of the Lord came upon me and brought me out in the Spirit of the Lord, and set me down in the midst of the valley; and it was full of bones. 2 Then He caused me to pass by them all around, and behold, there were very many in the open valley; and indeed they were very dry. 3 And He said to me, “Son of man, can these bones live?”

So I answered, “O Lord God, You know.”

4 Again He said to me, “Prophesy to these bones, and say to them, ‘O dry bones, hear the word of the Lord! 5 Thus says the Lord God to these bones: “Surely I will cause breath to enter into you, and you shall live. 6 I will put sinews on you and bring flesh upon you, cover you with skin and put breath in you; and you shall live. Then you shall know that I am the Lord.”’”

7 So I prophesied as I was commanded; and as I prophesied, there was a noise, and suddenly a rattling; and the bones came together, bone to bone. 8 Indeed, as I looked, the sinews and the flesh came upon them, and the skin covered them over; but there was no breath in them.

9 Also He said to me, “Prophesy to the breath, prophesy, son of man, and say to the breath, ‘Thus says the Lord God: “Come from the four winds, O breath, and breathe on these slain, that they may live.”’” 10 So I prophesied as He commanded me, and breath came into them, and they lived, and stood upon their feet, an exceedingly great army.

11 Then He said to me, “Son of man, these bones are the whole house of Israel. They indeed say, ‘Our bones are dry, our hope is lost, and we ourselves are cut off!’ 12 Therefore prophesy and say to them, ‘Thus says the Lord God: “Behold, O My people, I will open your graves and cause you to come up from your graves, and bring you into the land of Israel. 13 Then you shall know that I am the Lord, when I have opened your graves, O My people, and brought you up from your graves. 14 I will put My Spirit in you, and you shall live, and I will place you in your own land. Then you shall know that I, the Lord, have spoken it and performed it,” says the Lord.’”

Aren't we tired of the B-word......?

I know I am tired of it.  It controls my life sometimes... you know the one; B-U-S-Y.

Yep, that one.  I am so tired of losing the only resource we cannot gain back in our lives.  Especially when I am losing it in a season where I am spending the majority of time doing things I don't even want to do.

BUT, (my favorite B-word), but I am coming up on a time that I will enjoy, very soon.  I have my field study for graduate school coming up.  This field study just happens to be in Mongolia, and I just so happen to get a few days before hand in Korea (yes the Asian nation that stole my heart).

So I will enjoy great food, lounge in jjimjilbangs, meet up with friends, and get to enjoy two services with my church. I haven't planned a lot about it, but I am going to be in Seoul and Busan.  And I am going to be so happy.

Other updates:

• The woodpeckers have fledged and after much chasing with lenses we were able to spot one of our banded ones in the wild.
• Burn season will close in the next few weeks, bringing our increasingly smaller team down to 2 people which means more fun scienc-y land management will be in my workdays.
• I am hoping to meet my dad, stepmom, and dog down in Savannah just before heading off to my field study.  I am beyond joyful about that too!

The Discomfort of Traveling to Zambia

I slept on the porch of our hostel since my mosquito net (which I am repeatedly reminded by rain is not a tent) flooded and held a nice amount of mud.  Lights on, people talking, I fell into an intermittent sleep at about 1:30am. Then awoke at 5:00am to pack.

No worries, I tell myself.  I can sleep on the bus to Zambia.  But that was before I realized that God wasn't done with growing me through discomfort yet.  After getting on the bus and going through multiple police check points that won't allow sleep since they must ALL see your passport, we got to the border.  This was a trial of its own since Malawians kept cutting us in the visa line with the excuse "you are so many".  Yes we were many but because of them cutting us it took 45 mins for our team  to get process after arriving at the window (that is not counting time spent in line...just time that we were being "helped").

After the border crossing I finally thought I would sleep on the bus.  I had a good aisle seat to spread out a little and I took a Dramamine to help with the sickness and lull me to sleep.  BANG!  Beside me a stood is slammed down beside me in the aisle and a man placed upon it. I now am squished between too people...and stool man of course is uncomfortably fidgeting the whole time.  His cheap, rough, suit rubbing my arm raw.  And his body forcing mine to lean away in a position that later cause such pain on the left side of my spine that I was brought to tears.  THIS WAS A LONG BUS RIDE!

We stopped at the side of the road so men could get off to pee.  As stool man was off, I slid his stool back just enough that he wouldn't have to touch me so much.  It was easy to do since everyone was tripping over it to get off the bus anyway.  When he got back on, he moved his stool back into alignment with my seat.  SO MAD.

Then our bus found itself debating whether to roll through a closed off road that was under construction or to take the detour through the mud.  For fear of being stuck they chose the closed road.  To make this happen they had to move the road block, which happened to be giant boulders on the street. This took many men and much time.  They would always try to avoid more work by just picking one large boulder to move and hoping we would fit through...when in reality it would have been better to move two smaller boulders a little to the left and right and slip in...but they do what they think is best.  We scratched by the rocks and proceeded.  This occurred 3 more times before our bus driver said "screw it" and drove down a bank to the little dirt detour road that we spent the last hour trying to avoid.

We also had a five minute stop at some shacks they called a rest stop.  There was a fee toilet and I figured it was getting time to go.  But I didn't have Zambian Kwatcha to pay the fee.  They lectured me about that, a lot, saying that it was dumb to travel without the money.  But I had no intention of paying for a toilet even if I had money, so I started around to the back of the building to pee there.  The lecturer yells to me that there is a fine for peeing outside.  To which I respond, "I cannot pee inside, I cannot pee outside.  Am I supposed to pee on myself?"  I left off the part I want to say, "Is there a fine or fee for that?"

Because this isn't my first time threatening to pee myself in public, and I am shameless about it, they let me in to the toilet without paying a fee.  But with all the lost time, the bus was done waiting and was honking to pull out of the lot.  Not feeling a good first impression of Zambia.

Night began to fall, and as impressed as I was by the mix of African Music Videos and Backstreet Boys, Brandy, and Usher, my gaze went outside to the sunset.  They full day of miserable travel weight heavy, especially on my left side where stool man was still leaning. (Seriously...there are 69 other people on this bus...couldn't he at least take turns sitting next to people.)  But with this sunset, I promised myself, that I wouldn't let this be a repeat of Malawi.  That I would let the end of this day be the begin of a new, better one.  And that I was going to be okay.

So, here's to a new country and a better season.