Belize Blog- 07/19/2015

It’s a little toasty here in Belize.  

I do look forward to heading to the comfort of home in a little over a week.  I want to be fully present and enjoy my time here, which I am.  But home is not far from my mind.  The plethora of bug bites / chemical burns from deet mixed with sunscreen aside, it is comfortable here.  We have beds and showers.  We are working constantly and learning at every moment.  It’s hard to give you the typical day since every day is different. 

But for me, I wake at about 4:30am or 5:00am every morning.  This gives me time to read my bible and pray a little.  Also it’s a good time to journal.   Breakfast is at 6:00am typically and then some sort of class discussion or activity follows.  So far as activities go, we have designed and tested a couple of experiments both at the nature center and the zoo, gone on nature walks, gone to the howler monkey sanctuary, attended a homestay, toured some Mayan ruins, and today we head off to the Cayes for our coral section of the course.  The days are long though, since we finish our last discussion at about 8:30pm or 9:00pm typically.  I am the type of person who goes to bed shortly after that if I can.  I may journal then, but usually I am too tired.

I have actually managed to catch a cold, the snotting, coughing, throaty, sneezy type.  And it has drained me.  I was blessed enough to get to skip out on one lecture though, it was a review of some of the statistics that we covered online over the past few weeks.   So it’s really cool to have such flexible leaders here. 

Anyway…with the time crunch, I am going to have to run…so, [insert lovely blog wrap-up here]. 

Musings after returning from the Caye:  http://carolineritchey.theworldrace.org/?filename=preserving-memories-in-words

The Un-Settling…

Today I was reminded of the reason I cannot seem to get ahead these days.  All of this moving around leaves you feeling very unsettled, and that is unsettling.  I am consistently feeling like I am not at home (because really I am not), and I can’t seem to find rest since I am always walking on egg shells…trying not to impose or annoy both our hosts and my team.

Before coming on this trip, I thought I was prepared.  I moved around as a kid, I haven’t lived with family for almost 8 years now, and I lived internationally for a year.  But nothing could prepare me for the unsettling feeling of being unsettled.  We have moved every month, and sometimes more often than that.

Just yesterday we were approached at our host’s home by moving men and the sheriff.  They had a court order to evict all of us (host and guest alike) due to some legal matter with our host.  So we packed our bags as the men threw all of the family’s possessions onto the street.  Our Spirits were still high as we ate all the perishables on the curbside until the Pastor (our contact) showed up and rushed us away before the media could get there.  We are currently staying at his house, eight people in one little room, until our host gets things sorted.  Though, we are most likely here at Pastor’s home until the end of our stay here.

Laura and I eating the perishables wondering what eviction day will hold.

Last night I lay in my mosquito net, aware of the roaches, ants, and that HUGE spider that crawled on my leg right before bed.  I lay in a house that gets water once a week.  I lay in a home with my 7 teammates plus the 11 people that lived there to begin with.  I lay there and mourn the feeling that I was finally settling into our first home in Zimbabwe only to lose it.  I lay there and mourn the feeling of entitlement that I have to constantly replace with gratitude.  I lay there and mourn the Zim-family I will probably not see again, knowing that I didn’t get to say goodbye.  And I can only stop the crying when I am tired enough to believe that it will be better in the morning.

AND as always, it truly is better in the morning.

I am blessed to be in the home with Pastor, Mama Pastor, and the 9 others including a couple little ones.  The baby cries when any of the white people get too close, but I know I will hold her before our time here is up.

And over breakfast, I had a heart to heart with a teammate about how exhausting it is to be a guest for a year, and how unsettled I feel.  She had advice on being open to have God show me what it means to be at home in Him.  And to learn to refresh, rest, and be free in a place that isn’t my own.

There is so much to learn, but I know that God has good plans for these next couple months.  As my stress levels seem to skyrocket, I just need to know that it’s okay.

(PS.  As I type this, one of the little ones, a three year old boy named courage, plopped down next to me and is splitting my headphones with me.  As he listens to my indie music he tries to speak to me in Shona (not knowing that I haven’t a clue what he is saying), and I am limited to saying; hi, thanks, yes, no, and porridge.  He does get excited when I say porridge.  And sometimes he tries to sing along with the music.  Gosh, he is so cute.  Gosh, I am so blessed)

To see my Fundraiser Flyer see: http://carolineritchey.theworldrace.org/?filename=fundraiser-flyer-and-birthday-photo