It’s been a while since I blogged on here, but I did want a
break from online sharing, so I guess I got it. But I have a couple things to
share now. The first is to say that I
went on a trip to Vermont to an oil painting workshop with my current
wet-on-wet idol, Wilson Bickford. I have
wanted to do this for years, and back in February, when I was struggling
through Zambia. I called mom for one of
our skype dates, and she suggested that we take the trip when I returned home
since there was a scheduled workshop in October. And being in Africa, it never seemed like it
would happen. I mean, how could I
justify the cost? How could I even
consider spoiling myself after seeing so much poverty? How could I do anything back home when just
living abroad was hard enough? I couldn’t
plan…I couldn’t hope. But Mom did. And I thank God. Because, this past weekend was AMAZING. I want to share more about that and photos
soon.
The real reason I am writing however is because I received a
letter today. This letter was written by
me back in April. I was in Malaysia at
the time and was probably in one of my darker points of the race. But I was learning so much even in the
pain. And I wanted to share this
letter. The full disclosure is risky for
me, because being open makes one vulnerable, but I think that I am not the only
that can benefit from the words from that past struggle.
So here we go:
“Hello Caroline,
Recently,
things have been rough. Rougher than
Bolivia Caroline would ever know. But
death won’t be spoken over you and ‘Mara’ is not your name!
YOUR BODY MAY BE DUST, BUT GOD
BREATHED HIS SPIRIT IN YOU! You are
precious to Him and you can’t help but reflect Him. It’s natural!
PEOPLE SEE GOD IN YOU MORE THAN YOU DO (BECAUSE YOU ARE YOUR OWN WORST
CRITIC…ALWAYS HAVE BEEN… But ask anyone.
You are amazing. And don’t waste
your time on anyone who will tell you otherwise.)
AS YOU TOLD ***** [that was a private conversation], ‘Stay Strong
& Stay You!’ AND PLEASE: Enjoy! Life
is too short to allow yourself to struggle with that. Release, Be,
Enjoy, ______
WHO KNOWS WHAT THIS MONTH’S ROCK
WILL SAY? [I collected rocks from each
country and wrote a word that described my greatest lesson learned in that
country. My word for Malaysia ended up
being “persevere”.] You are His…and
you look like your Father.”
Wow right! I know
this will help me out so much in the coming time and I hope that by being
honest, I have helped someone else that needed to hear how awesome they are.
(Vermont Photos to Come Soon...)
