Life

So...in life, the devil comes after you in many ways.  In the past, like all of us, I had some struggles.  I had anxiety attacks.  I found myself wounded to the point of hopelessness and anger towards God.  And like the AMAZING God He is, He healed me.

So, here in America, things are going back to normal (whatever that means).  And I was asked to prepare a testimony for church.  I did it a few weeks early and it was good.  As the time got nearer to me sharing, I found myself questioning my past events.  I thought to myself, "things couldn't have been THAT bad...you are blowing it out of proportion.  Surely you never really were depressed...."

I caught myself though and starting writing in my prayer Journal, "Daddy, sometimes my past year's struggle seems so far away.  Sometimes I can't even believe it happened.  BUT GOD!  My story is one of your saving grace...of your healing.  And Lord, let me never forget how low I was because it is proof of how high you raised me up."  I realized that if Satan could tell me that I didn't really struggle...then he could tell me that I wasn't really healed.

The second way that the devil tried to get me was soon to follow.  I started to think a lot about my friends and church family that are still in Korea.  I began to "innocently" wonder what I would be doing if I were still there this time of year.  I would be preparing for winter camp, I would be planning my holiday, and I would be growing like crazy with my family at church.  Then I started to long for this.  I wished I was still there and I began to be discontent where I was.  I needed to believe without a doubt that God has brought me where I am right now.  And that He has a plan for me.  But....I chose a different line of thought.

Later that night came the third wave of Satan's attack (this being the night before I was to give my testimony).  I was putting Wally the Boa back into his cage and my father gave me a kiss before he headed back to bed.  And then, I started to get the symptoms of one of my old panic attacks.  At that point I realized what all this had been.  It had been an attack from my enemy.  An attack that I just let happen...and didn't try to fight before.  BUT NOW I WAS READY TO FIGHT!

I needed some good out loud prayer..you know the kind where you yell at the devil with all the authority you get as a son of God.  Yeah...that kinda prayer!  So I took my dog with me...(cuz I wasn't going outside alone at midnight!) and went to the quietest darkest place I could find.  (That wimpy dog was a scaredy-cat and needed a lot of affirmation to get himself out there with me.  He kept looking longingly back at the warm house during this walk).  Once we were there, I sat down and did my thing.  It was only about five minutes worth of praying and there was this freedom.

Sometimes we think that we have to pray hours on end, or all night even, to solve the big problems.  But really...God doesn't want us to struggle with things that long.  He wants us to put the devil in his place quickly and get back to life.

Anyway...I just wanted to share this with you all.  If God has healed you of something and you find yourself in a struggle, don't feel that you failed.  Don't feel that you may have never have gotten healed in the first place.  Don't feel you are doing something wrong.  Take it as a sign that you are doing something right and that you got the devil a little nervous.

That's what I did.  I made him nervous because I was going to share the healing that God has done in my life.  And thanks to Him, I was able to share with confidence and assurance that He is good!  PRAISE HIM!

And that's life!

Holiday Highlights... (so far)

So this holiday season has been one of the most fun ones of my adult life. There are many memorable moments that point out how crazy this family is. And I love it!

• When the Sunshine the Cat climbed the ladder to help hang the lights on the eaves.
• When Kyle and I worked in the Garage late at night on a Christmas present. "Kyle, we just hit a wooden toy with a rubber mallet, WE ARE ELVES!"
• When the storm that hit the other night blew chunks off the house above my window....YIKES!
• When we survived the Last Day on Earth. I was washing the range of the oven and the dogs went crazy howling...for no reason, and then the lights went out. I proceeded to scream, "It's the end of the world!" And woke everyone in the house..te he he.
• When I danced to Latin music in the car with Harry Chops, our new Venus Fly Trap. Then I proceeded to hunt down his dinner with the fly swatter.
• When it takes five minutes to remember the chorus of a Christmas song, and then belting that song out for the rest of the car ride...until someone begs to turn on the radio... :-P
• Laying in the folks bed and beating them at Words with Friends every night (our version of family game night).
• And lastly, our trip to New York....Crazy Fun!

There is truly no place like home for the Holidays!

PA and NYC

My grandparents live in Pennsylvania.  I haven't seen them in over a year so my folks and I thought it would be good to visit them this December (since I am between year long contracts).   It was a quiet pleasant visit with family.  We baked cookies, watched a Christmas parade, and played lots and lots of online scrabble against each other.  

My Pop and I in PA

After we left them, we set off for New York City.  I had only been once, and it was only for a few hours worth of seeing and eating in Time Square.  So as you can tell, I was really excited to get back and see more.

In front of Wollman Rink in Central Park

For this trip, we planned out quite a bit.  When we arrived, we checked into our hotel in NJ and took the bus over to NYC.  Once there, we walked through Central Park (WHICH IS HUGE!!!), popped by the Rockefeller Center to see the tree, then went to Time Square to eat the most delicious Chana Saag I have had, at a place called Bombay Marsala.  Afterwards, with renewed energy we headed down Broadway until we reached Macy's on 34th Street.  This building was the size of a city block and had 10 floors.  I couldn't believe it.   BUT, the true reason to visit Macy's during the Holiday's is to see the REAL Santa.  :-)  I am happy to say that we were not the only adults there.  We finished the night off at frozen yogurt buffet.  Yeah!

The next day we woke up and headed on the subway to Ground Zero.  We had a slight mishap in the Metro though.  The card that we bought wouldn't let my father through the gate.  My stepmom, Penny, was telling him just to jump it, seeings how we paid for the ticket anyway...but I warned them that there was a steep fine for that sort of thing.  And I am thankful that he didn't jump it because there were two metro police watching the whole thing from the corner.  So the running joke is that Penny almost got dad arrested in the subway.  We even made up epic stories about how they tackled him to the ground as he was wearing my pink thirty one back pack.  Te he he.

Daddy doesn't look too shaken by his run in with the Police ;-P

Anyway, I was a little wary about going to the World Trade Center because I am still really moved by what happened there.  I didn't know what to expect and it just felt odd that Ground Zero would be a tourist spot.  Once I got there though, my fears were relieved.  The place was a memorial.  Where the buildings once stood were two fountains, the size of the base of each building.  They were surrounded by a memorial garden and inside the garden was a tree called the survivor tree.  It was the only tree to survive the attack.  Overall, it was sobering, but worth seeing.



After that, we headed out on the Staten Island Ferry to get a good look at Lady Liberty and the skylines of a few Burroughs.  Then we walked along the historic port district, under the Brooklyn Bridge, and up into Chinatown for a good lunch and some bubble tea.  Then we caught the subway back to the bus terminal and headed home.

With the REAL Santa

It was a great trip.  We saw so much, yet still left so much unseen.  This is a place that we will surely have to return to.  I am very thankful to my folks for taking me up there and dealing with my whiny style of navigation.  (I usually stand on the corners with the map saying..."Guys!..I don't know where we are going!")

:-D  Happy Holidays all!